The Machinery of Night

Arrr, Me Hearties!

It be, fer a few more bells, Talk Like a Pirate Day. Did ye think I'd be fergettin'? Sadly, I got no pirate wisdom to impart.

Haply, other blokes do. Jackleg Jim Lileks gives ye the local news in pirate patois. But that's Minnysoty news, so it's about as excitin' as swabbin' the deck with yer toothbrush.

Agent "Bilgewater" Bedhead brings us a pirate parade, starrin' Drew Barrymore, whatever that might be. I'd ask young Drew to introduce me to Captain Badass there in the second photo, but, ye see, it's a gay pirate parade. Arrr. Ain't it always the way. The pink polly's a nice touch.

Speakin' a pollies, follow the link to the story o' the dead pirates' friend. Arrr. But stay out o' the alien corn squeezins, for they'll gives ye St. Elmo's Fire in the Belly.

Dave "Dead Dog" Barry, who has done more'n any other cur ta promote pirate talk, is almost completely ignorin' the occasion this year, because o' some nonsense about a a book, and appearin' on the talkin' picture box. If'n ye believe in that sort o' thing.

Lastly, we will leave ye with the special wisdom of the late, lamented ChomskyPirate, whoever he was.

Chomsky hisself ignored the occasion entirely. Arr! Some linguist he is. (Is it really necessary to decorate each and every one o' yer posts with a grinnin' skull, laddie? Seems excessive.)