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Sunday, November 13, 2005

Time Lag

One of Instapundit's readers notes that today's "Doonesbury" (which I didn't see; I haven't read it in years) comes from an alternate universe in which Harriet Miers is still being considered for the Supreme Court. This was also true of last week's "Opus", which was at least amusing and non-partisan.

Perhaps Breathed has decided that being cutting-edge topical is too difficult and risky, because this week's "Opus" is recycled from an old "Bloom County" strip, in which Steve Dallas comes home to find his mother in his house. She's been cleaning and opens up his anxiety closet to discover that she's in it. He even uses the same damn punchline!

At least "Opus" is charming and occasionally amusing. I used to love "Sylvia". I went so far as to attend a performance of Sylvia's Real Good Advice in Chicago, many years ago. (Featuring the cat national anthem "Everything Here Is Mine".)

Alas, Nicole Hollander has come down with a bad case of Bush Derangement Syndrome and has sacrificed her wit in favor of non-stop Bush bashing. Here are a few completely fictional examples that I think will give the flavor of her recent work.

(Sylvia is watching TV.)
TV Announcer: Here's a tiny news item. It involves something the government did about two weeks ago. We really can't do it justice in the three panels of this cartoon. But if we say it fast, it'll sound funny.
Sylvia: Rita, can I...
Rita: No, Mom.

The Woman Who Lies in Her Diary Goes to Washington DC...
Woman writing: "Today I went to DC and who should I run into but Donald Rumsfeld! 'Rummy!' I cried. 'I just love you! Can I have your autograph?' And then I whipped out my favorite purple fountain pen and thrust it into his eye, stabbing repeatedly until the blood gushed and his brains spurted. 'This is for the poor innocents at Abu Ghraib!' I shouted, as thousands cheered."
Woman (to viewer): "Oh, like you never thought of it."

The Rhino series.

A. I would really like for President Bush to meet with me personally and show me all the intelligence he got which implied that Saddam Hussein was working on WMDs and carefully explain that he honest and truly did not lie to get us into a war so that his old oil buddies would become 0.0001% richer.

B. I'd rather be buggered by a rhino with Saddam's mustache.

If you didn't think any of that was funny, then I have accurately captured the tenor of "Sylvia" these days. Sad, really.