The Machinery of Night

Posted 1:39 PM by Angie Schultz

Music for Carports

Tim Blair (note: blogger permalink weirdness again today) has yet another of his periodic gripes about Maureen Dowd being in the Sydney Morning Herald three days after her column appeared in the NYT. He'd have a point, except she's more appropriate there than in a (sort of) real newspaper like the NYT. However, I'm not disposed to quibble, because I'm not going to register with the NYT just to read Dowd columns---or for any other reason, come to that---and the SMH doesn't make you register. So I'm happy to see stale Dowd in Sydney, else I'd never get to mock her first hand.

Her current column is a bit of useless navel lint about Eminem, how he's soooo respectable now. Dowd's suburban matron "girlfriends" (oy) praise his authentic macho (yo, and they down wit' da street, too---word).

Dowd says:

Frantic to be hip, eager to stay young, we are robbing our children of their toys.

Good. They'd put someone's eye out.

Like Mick Jagger, we want to deny the reality of time and be cool unto eternity.

Which brings us to this Dave Barry column about the dessicated leathery freshness that is the Stones. Niles and I read that last night and were inspired to perform a Muzak version of "Satisfaction". This was rendered slightly more difficult by the fact that we didn't remember the words. In fact, I found today that I never knew the words (oh, he screams them so, honey!). So we had to make do:

I can't get noooooooo
I can't get noooooooo
I can't get noooooooo
Satisfactioooooon

We sounded like the Lennon Sisters.

This morning I looked up the words and tried again. Niles told me I sounded like the Carpenters---in other words, too much like rock 'n roll.

I'm not going to take the trouble to record and link to these efforts. Fortunately for you, and all mankind.

Try it. Here are the lyrics. Come on! It's fun!

Next up: "Cum On Feel the Noize" by the FemmeTonez.